BSU!! & Life

So I am learning new skills. Like how to post youtube videos to my blog. There you have it, some fun BSU band stuff. Amber's first performance day at BSU. You can see her in the one on the bottom as they are marching to where they did the flash mob. I find it exciting and fun and especially after BSU football's first game of the season. It looks like another exciting year. If BSU gets to go to a bowl game, Amber will so get to to go. Lee Joe is just dying to go to the BSU vs Oregon State game. That will be Amber's first football game performance.

She has started her sophomore year. She is looking into internships in the summer for the next two summers. She has been contemplating Colorado for some reason. I am not to sure the nature of what those are. She is thinking about the INL here in Eastern Idaho. Because Barbara Morgan being an Idaho teacher. They offer some internships at NASA. That would be exciting if she could do that. She just found out about this crazy great scholarship opportunity with them so it would be so exciting to see what happens if she tries for that.

We are down one person in the house. We had gained one in May and Justice Emilee went to BYU-Idaho this past weekend. It made for an interesting summer with the female hormone factor upped up another notch. Drama-but not the worst. Her last week before she left was bumpy with a fresh root canal as the last preparations for going were taking place. She got her driving part of her license done and now she needs to get the written part out of the way. We tried to get there before she went but she was so sick and miserable and then the envelope was lost when she was ready to try and go. It wasn't found until after 6 on Friday. We shopped, she packed and we loaded up the van minus one seat and a couple of girls and took the 3 youngest and her to Rexburg. We stopped at Craters of the Moon on the way. It was CRAZY windy but not hot. We climbed through a cave and some of us had issues with the part where you could hear bats. But we climbed through to the end. Then we had to climb up and through the lava rock to get back to the trail on the way back. We got to Rexburg and got her moved in early Monday. She is so social so she is in social paradise there right now. Pretty funny.

I am back at work. Exhausted like always. Lee Joe is gone just as much as he was with his other job. The pay is better. But life here is still like I am a single parent and so tired I am quite detatched from the kids and now I feel like my kids are falling apart. Kelsea is a serious challenge at the moment. Then last night Kylee was at football game, then she was home for few minutes before she went to babysit for awhile. When she got home I was so exhausted that I went to bed before I really talked to her. I find out on Facebook today because of her status that some mom of a boyfriend she had kept calling her terrible names and were telling the kids that she knew horrible things about Kylee that were unbelievable coming from a mom. I had to ask her several times "The mom said that? She said that?" and then flipped my daughter off as she drove away. Oh my goodness!! I am a terrible awful mother!! No I'm not, that woman is. But that is how I feel. Just awful. How come I wasn't better about talking to her. Kylee is quiet about things like that. It's heartbreaking. I would have been contacting everyone at the school I could think of had I known about it last night. But this is a mom of a kid that now attends another school. I will be knocking down doors tomorrow for sure. I think she will be getting a cell phone a little sooner rather than later.
That is where it hits me. My kids are not being cared for up to the standards that I have set for them. Yes, life happens. But I really need to be there for them the way I really like and want to be there for them. And working doesn't do that for them even though I am there for other people's kids all day long. Hopefully soon I will be in a position to make some decisions and make some choices that I want to make not the ones that I have to just to get by.